Three months ago I found the position for Guest House manager in Peru on the same day I was starting a Bible study called “Sacred Rhythms in the Psalms.” That was the Bible study where I announced that night that I was moving to Peru (refer back to my very first entry). This Tuesday, the 13th, I started a Bible study on Jonah and 1, 2, 3 John. It was on this day that I happened to be looking at the SIM website and realized that the position I had been pursuing was gone. I even looked it up by number (because I’m a nerd and I remember numbers), and it was nowhere to be found. My first thought? “Uh oh. Is God going to ask me to go to Nineveh?”

I am fairly certain that God’s not calling me to modern day Nineveh, but just as lifelong singleness was my personal “hut in Africa,” I wondered if there was some other place or some other position that God might call me to that would be my personal Nineveh. I didn’t exactly panic when I realized that the position was missing, but I did find my heart sinking a bit. I wondered why that particular position would have jumped off the screen at me if it wasn’t where God ultimately wanted me to go. Would He use something that sounded so interesting and fun, and was such a good fit for me, just to get my attention? Would He then ask me to do something that I wouldn’t be as immediately enamored by?

I was quite startled by the wave of emotions that I experienced when I realized the position was gone. Of course I took the practical step of writing to inquire about the disappearance since I knew that no one had been in the pipeline for that position in January, but answers weren’t immediately available. I had to decide whether I was only doing “that which He has for me” if that meant Peru, or if I was truly ready to do “that which He has for me” regardless of the location or position. It’s a lot easier to say “yes” to an option when it’s appealing! I’ll be fascinated to see what the study of Jonah hold for me now.